You’ve Been Here Too Long…

It’s that time of year again. A time for long speeches, celebratory dinners, and the obligatory silver pen and pencil gift set. No, I’m not speaking of retirement, but rather a different right of passage, commencement. As a lifetime member of the academy, first as a student and now as a professor, I have attended and participated in more graduation events than I can recall. And despite some high profile keynote speakers (e.g., Lance Armstrong, and Buzz Aldrin) it would be fair to say that few have been particularly memorable.

However, most recently at the High Point University Baccalaureate I heard a message delivered by Dr. Dwight Andrew, Senior Minister of First Congregational United Church of Christ in Atlanta and Associate Professor of Music at Emory University and an accomplished musician, which roused my interest and led me to a brief moment of reflection. Dr. Andrew based his message on Old Testament scripture in which the God of the Israelites instructs his people that they have “dwelt long enough in this mount” and that they must not stay in one place but move along their journey.

As I often say to my MBA students, we human beings do not like change. The irony is that if you ask most people they will tell you emphatically that they “like to try new things”, “get bored when things get too routine”, and wish the dinosaur companies they work for “were simply more open to change”. However, the reality is…we say we do, we may even believe we do, but when push comes to shove we typically do not like change.

Our tendency to avoid change is supported on many fronts. As humans we consistently strive to predict and control our environment by decreasing ambiguity and increasing consistency. Creating predictable routines can relieve stress and emotional loads. However, even conscious, rational thought is resistant to change. How much new information does it take to change someone’s existing opinion? Researchers have demonstrated that even when we do try to integrate new, inconsistent information with our existing base of knowledge and beliefs, our overall impressions rarely change.

And the tendency to stick with the status quo is not limited to the rank and file. When discussing the philosophical and tactical changes leaders must enact for their organizations to rise above the competition, Dr. Jeffrey Pfeffer of Stanford University states, “In order to be exceptional and earn extraordinary returns you have to dare to be different. And so everybody says,  ‘Yes, I want to be different, but I don’t want to be that different.” And if you are one of the chosen few who approach change with open arms, the next challenge is inspiring your spouse, coworker, or subordinate to join you with equal zest and determination. Leadership is all about influence, and if you can influence others to embrace change you have a rare and coveted skill.

Undoubtedly, change can be difficult, anxiety provoking, and at times can entail great risk. But on this spring evening in Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church as I thought about these soon-to-be college graduates, leaving the safe and well-worn halls of their beloved alma mater, I was reminded that to grow and become “exceptional” we all must opt for change, whether it be in our personal or professional lives. So as you reflect on your current situation, ask yourself…”Have I been here to long?” And if the answer is yes, perhaps the time has come to “move along your journey”.

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Leadership vs. Management

A recent trip took us to a restaurant, where I was reminded that there will always be a difference between managers and leaders. As developers of leaders, we frequently facilitate the conversation about those very differences, and often one of the distinctions noted places managers in a category reserved for those who carry out someone else’s vision, while leaders are in the business of developing people.

We were the unfortunate witnesses to a public (out in the open area of the restaurant, in front of other patrons and bar staff) berating of our waitress by the general manager of the restaurant. Our waitress, overcome with tears, continued to provide us with exceptional customer service, but our two conversations (both of our own initiation) with the general manager proved less than satisfying.

I concede that I don’t know ALL the facts surrounding the disaster, that ended with our waitress quitting, and our abrupt departure from the restaurant, not having eaten because we no longer felt welcome or hungry. However, I do think there are some common lessons we can glean from the experience.

Regardless of the circumstances, and whether or not some grave error had been committed by the waitress (she seated us after the kitchen no longer wanted to prepare food), here’s what I think the general manager lost for the restaurant in one night:

  1. The obvious and immediate loss to the restaurant was our business. They lost immediate revenue for the food that was prepared, but we chose not to eat. The general manager assumed the cost in our departing conversation.
  2. Naturally, we will not be returning, so there is no future revenue, either.
  3. Also lost was our respect for the general manager, and subsequently, the restaurant group that employs him. We were appalled at the outburst, and felt that no behavior could possibly warrant such a reproach.
  4. We immediately wrote a negative review on one prominent social media site, and then tweeted about it, too. Remember that one unhappy customer who speaks out publicly is just the tip of your proverbial iceberg when it comes to your real issues. When was the last time you questioned your customers about their satisfaction levels?
  5. Our waitress was doing her job, and doing it very well by our account. The restaurant lost an employee that not only did her job, but she put the needs of her customers at the top of her priorities. Shouldn’t that be the ultimate desire of any company in the business of customer service?

When we choose to react, rather than to act, we choose to behave at the mercy of our emotions. As leaders, we are completely dependent on those whom we employ for our successes. Developing people is a skill that requires keeping your emotions in check and allowing direct reports to make errors. How else can we possibly help them grow and improve if we intercept their ability to choose? In so doing, we will slowly cut off all of our relationships, and there won’t be any customers left to serve.

While I’d like to believe this was an isolated incident with a power-hungry manager, I know it’s not true. We have each seen this scenario played out in numerous offices, retail establishments, and restaurants. When have you seen poor management in action? Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end?

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